Thursday, June 14, 2012

Leeroy Berlin - Four Poems

Do I Hit Him, Hug Him, or High Five Him?
seven years is a long time to carry
a grudge over something as pointless as
a piece of beautiful ass, however,
matters of principle should never be
taken lightly. There was a trade-off: I
lost the smell of her hair at two am
after sneaking through her bedroom window,
and i lost calling 911 after
she ODed a second time, and i lost
the way she moved when she talked and how she
laughed with her whole body, and i lost her
lying to cover her cheating. All those
things he took from me, and two years on he
lost them to some other unfortunate
schmuck. maybe i'll buy him a beer for his
trouble. it's the least i can do.

Meeting Judge Holden
in a filipino dance hall seven thousand
miles from Nacogdoches
standing by the bar
seven feet tall
with a mustache fit for Snidely Whiplash
in a clean black suit
pulling too young filipinas onto the dance floor
and watching him dance
and he danced
and swore he would never die
whether he drowned any puppies at the beach that night
i can't say
but i know four washed ashore
that morning.
it was not an unusual occurrence.

a little excess force
chipped the bottle
call it
enhanced opening
dusted off the broken bits
and drank it anyway.

it tasted like
of light.

Employment Prospects
the first hit on google for
your name
is a porn star in a
should you
put that on your resume?

Leeroy Berlin was last seen escaping from a cul-de-sac somewhere in the bowels of Suburbia, Los Angeles CA.  He is rumored to have been seen on several isolated Pacific islands, though these reports may not be trustworthy and often contradict each other placing him simultaneously in indistinguishable locations thousands of familiar miles apart.

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